baby boy

Late in February, I had a baby boy, Elijah. He was too premature to make it in this world, so he stayed for a very short time, then left us. I have been grieving his loss since, in my own way. Still am. It will take a while, perhaps forever.

I became pregnant in October and we were thrilled. Everything progressed as it should until it didn't - I had some complications that went from "Rest and take it easy, but things are okay" to "Would you like to terminate?" in the matter of about a month. Within a two weeks, I delivered a tiny, but otherwise perfect, baby boy.

But I've also been inspired by his short life to make the most of my own. I realize I had been really just juggling too much, too often.

When I hit the brakes, I began to realize the life I want to make. And that is a life of MAKING. I had been dreaming up lots of things but just figured I couldn't carve out the time with a toddler and my other responsibilities. And while it is hard (she is not by any means a good sleeper), I have found my sew-jo again. I am MAKING. And it feels good, like I've gotten in touch with an old friend.

I've missed the community I had while blogging. I've missed making and creating. I've missed the accomplishment that comes from finishing something myself. I'm also really, really inspired to sew right now. Perhaps it is keeping me sane, perhaps the business with my hands keeps my heart from dwelling in my own thoughts. Either way, I want to get back into blogging all the making. Sort of like therapy. If my sewing machine could talk.....